


Liar

by Morethancupcake



Series: Sugar and spice [11]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Alternate Universe, Angst with a Happy Ending, Established Castiel/Dean Winchester, Fluff and Angst, Goodgirl!Lisa, Jealousy, M/M, Misunderstandings
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-12-19
Updated: 2014-12-19
Packaged: 2018-03-02 06:10:37
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,699
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2802380
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Morethancupcake/pseuds/Morethancupcake
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"Are you even planning on being back here at all ?" </p><p>Castiel is waiting for Dean to be home for Christmas. But apprently Dean made other plans.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Liar

**Author's Note:**

> day 11 : snogging in front of the fireplace

Castiel was smiling, gathering all the wrappings and empty glasses scattered around. It had been a great surprise. 

Balthazar had been the first to arrive, with an expensive bottle and some chocolates. "I can't let you not make a fool of yourself before Christmas, Love."

Then Sam and Gabriel, with food, and cakes and eggnog. "We were in the neighborhood, and could hear you cry from afar."

Bobby was the last, looking annoyed by this whole thing, and shoving a bottle of his very fine whiskey in Castiel's hand, before muttering something like "I promised that boy I should keep an eye on you."

It had been surreal. And really sweet. And yes, he had been crying at one point this afternoon, because he was tired, and missing Dean. But they didn't need to know.

Lisa had called a few nights ago, crying and terrified. Ben had been in lots of trouble, lately, and he was in the hospital for the night. Castiel had already put together Dean's bag and organized things with Bobby before the end of the call. He knew how much Dean and Ben loved each other, and he knew Dean just had to see him now. He understood.

Dean had called several times, updating him on how things were. He was very confident he would be there before Christmas, and Castiel had just trusted him completely. Midnight was right around the corner, and he was still hoping. He was feeling warm and happy, with the help of Balthazar very generous handling on drinks, and all he could think about was Dean. Dean. He smiled like an idiot at his phone when he saw the ID.

"Dean ? Where are you ?" He could hear voices in the background, and laugh. He was pretty sure it was Ben. "Is Ben with you ?" Some whispers, and then just the sound of music. It sounded like the Impala, but maybe not.

"Yeah, Cas..." Castiel lost his smile immediately. He knew that tone. They had been together for a while now. They knew each other well. Castiel stopped moving and sat down in fron of the fireplace. "About that... I mean, I am not sure how it'll go." 

"What do you mean ?" He could hear his voice sounding wrong, he was unsure, and talking like a very younger version of himself. "You're not on the way ? Tomorrow then ?" More shuffling on the line, and a few whispers. 

"I'm sorry, Cas. Ben and Lisa were very lonely, and.. I guess I'll just stay with them tonight. Probably tomorrow, too." The silence that followed was so heavy, Castiel could feel it on his chest. Tomorrow was Christmas Eve. "Cas ? You still here ?"

"Yes, Dean." He was suddenly really cold, and certainly not happy anymore.

"I'm sorry, buddy. It's just.. I'm caught up in all of these things, meeting old friends and everything. Lisa's parents are coming over, and they want to see me..." 

Castiel was so numb. He just couldn't understand what he was hearing. Surely it was a misunderstanding ? It couldn't be true ? "I don't really know when I'll be back, I'll give you a call ok ? " Castiel nodded a few times and was ready to end the call, but heard himself ask.

"Did you tell them you had plans for Christmas ?"

"What ? What do you mean ?" Dean sounded odd. Like he wasn't sure where this conversation was going. 

"Are you even planning on being back here at all ?"Castiel could feel his throat close up. He could feel the cold under his bare feet, and he was suddenly so tired. The silence grew between them, and he wasn't ready to talk about it just right now. "It's all right, Dean. we'll figure things out after the holidays. Merry Christmas." He hung up before making even more of a fool of himself. Of couse, Dean tried to call back. Once. Twice. Castiel put his phone on the sofa behind him, and tried to think.

He knew things weren't perfect between them, and he knew sometimes Dean missed the easy security of being a heterosexual man, but he had believed, really believed they were happy and okay. It had been years since he allowed himself to feel threatened by Lisa and Ben, and he had been sure things were fine.  
Surely Dean wouldn't have told him to get time away from work, and not to accept any invitations because he wanted to be with him ? Christmas was supposed to be a time for family and loved ones, after all. Castiel tried really hard to not cry, and lifted himself up and to the kitchen. He had things to get rid of. 

The first think he could see, in the kitchen, was the pie he had baked, cooling near the window. He didn't even flinch when throwing it into the bin. Then there was the chicken, and potatoes, the salmon, and all these things he didn't grow up with, but were so important to Dean. He felt so foolish, for believing things like "I want to make traditions with you", "I want to be with you", "You"re my family now."

Dean Winchester was a liar.

When all the food was gone, he started to clean, to erase any trace of glitter or celebration in the air. The mistletoe went to the bin, with the pince cones, and everything he could put his hands on. He was a man on a mission.

"I guess that's the reason you're not answering lover boy ?" He almost jumped, hearing Balthazar's voice, and scowled at him. He hated the fact his friend had a key, and always felt entitled to use it. "He called me to check on you, but didn't give many details." The smile on Balthazar's face faltered, and Castiel felt slightly better in the middle of this. "He made you cry. I'll tear him apart." 

"He's not coming back." Balthazar saved a mini cake before it could meet its end, and raised an eyebrow.

"He's not coming back tonight and you're cancelling Christmas ? Isn't it a little too much, Cassie ?" Castiel felt the words roll in his mouth and leave a bitter taste.

"He's staying at the Braeden's for Christmas. He's not coming back. At all." He was avoiding his friend's eyes, and could not tear his gaze away from the mess in the garbage bag. All this time, all this excitement. All for nothing. Balthazar's hand on his shoulder woke him up.

"Pack your bags, Castiel. You're staying at mine's tonight."

 

Balthazar had been a true friend. Screening the calls from Sam and Gabriel. And of course, from Dean. He had felt almost better, hearing Balthazar dismiss Dean with little care, and telling him to stop calling, Winchester, he'll talk to you when he'll feel like it. 

Christmas Eve had been quite enjoyable, being dragged by a overly enthusiastic Balthazar to a concert and then a very nice restaurant. They had talked about their childhood, and their families. Balthazar sharing stories about Michael in college, making Castiel laugh so much he almost cried. The blond man kept him pleasantly buzzed, with champagne and delicious food, and Castiel had been really good at just not thinking about the fact he was for now living on a very expensive couch. Tonight wasn't supposed to be about that. He was enjoying a cigarette outside when his phone rang again, and he didn't think much whe he answered.

"Castiel ?" The woman sounded unsure "Castiel Novak ?"

"Yes." He usually didn't get work calls on his personnal phone, and certainly not that late, but you never knew, these days. "May I help you ?"

"It's Lisa. Lisa Braeden." 

It felt like a cold shower. Like a slap. Like suddenly the happy bubble he was into exploded. 

"Please don't hang up now. Please." Castiel just puleed on his cigarette and waited for what was to come. "I just... I just wanted to talk to you." Castiel breathed out and tried not to snap. It would be stupid to hurt her. It was not her fault. "I'm not really sure I know what's going on right now, because Ben isn't saying much about it, but I think.."

"How could you not know, Lisa ?" Castiel had tried, at one point, to be friend with her. Dean was loving Ben like his own child, and and spent a lot of time with Lisa. Castiel had decided to treat them as Dean's family, and had always made an effort to exchange small talk and ask about her life. 

"Dean's not answering me when I ask what he's done, and I can obviously notice something is wrong. He says you're not living in the house right now. Is it because he came to visit ? I'm sorry Castiel. I'm sorry if I overstepped. I know I need to respect bondaries, and I need to be careful. But please, talk to Dean, he's..."

"Dean made a choice about staying with you, Lisa. I don't think I.. I am not ready to talk about this, and certainly not with you." Castiel could see his fingers shaking so badly the end of his cigarette fell into the snow at his feet. He took time to lit another one, hearing Lisa babbling about Dean and how scared he was and.. 

"Lisa, Dean chose to spend the holidays with you. I don't really need to point out how ludicrous of a situation that is. Please try to.."

"Dean is't here, Castiel." Castiel was so surprised to hear it he forgot to breathe and started to cough. He really needed to stop smoking. "He left in a hurry, didn't even say goodbye to me. He just dropped Ben to his dad's and went away. Now all he's saying is..." Castiel was just too shocked to process what she was saying. "He said he was staying here ?"

"He said he was probably not coming back, being wrapped up into old friends and family." 

The silence between them was awkward, at best. Castiel was trying to understand why Dean had lied to him, why he had said those things if they weren't true. 

"Wait a minute, please." There was sounds on the other side of the line, and from the corner of his eyes, he could see Balthazar looking at him through the french doors, obviously wondering what was going on. Castiel mouthed "Lisa" and chuckled at his friend's face. "Castiel. Excuse me ?" He went back to the call to a very pissed Lisa. "I'm going to pass you my son, and he'll explain himself to you."

"Hey Castiel..." Castiel smiled in spite of himself, because Ben was sounding terrified right now, and it was so darn adorable. "It was just a joke, you know...?"

"What do you mean, Ben ?" 

"It was supposed to be a big thing, like in movies, you know ? He was supposed to say he wasn't coming back, and then surprise you on Christmas Eve." He could hear Ben's voice shaking even more, with a pleading tone to it, and he was sure Lisa was now glaring at him. His mom used to do that all the time. "It was supposed to be great, we were on the way to find you a ring, but suddenly it went all wrong, and Dean was so upset, and you weren't answering your phone, so we had to..." A pause. 

"I'm sorry Castiel. It was a very mean thing to do, and it's not right to hurt people feelings like that." Castiel could tell the last part was more on Lisa's behalf, but he smiled anyway.

"It's all right, Ben. Thank you for explaining things to me." Castiel was smiling now. He was smiling when thanking Lisa for calling. He was smiling when coming back inside to explain a bewildered Balthazar what just happened. He was smiling driving back to the house, where the Impala was parked into the driveway, as usual.

 

It was very late. From outside, he could see the light of the christmas tree, and possibly the fireplace, and he walked faster, trying not to fall on the ice. The door was unlocked, and it was something he kept in his heart or later. Right now, he needed to find Dean. He hung up his coat and scarf at their usual places, noticing how Dean's duffel was still on the stairs, as if Dean hadn't been upstairs at all.  
He went to the kitchen, and he could see Dean had been cooking. More exactly, Dean had been replacing all the things Castiel left in the bin when leaving. A weirdly shaped pie was cooling next to the window, and Castiel could smell chicken, and potatoes. Dean had been cooking. Probably hoping for Castiel to come back home. The kitchen table was covered in Mary's china, and there was candles and flowers. 

Dean was sleeping in from of the fireplace. He was wrapped into the big feather comforter from their room, and had made himself a nest of pillows and blankets. He was wearing Castiel's sweats and shirt, and he was pretty sure the pillow he was crushing against his face was his.

Castiel took off his clothes, and wearing only his boxers, he lowered himself next to Dean, bringing him to his chest. Dean's eyes fluttered a few times, and he smiled a small and happy smile before remembering, and Castiel saw the green eyes pooling with tears. "It's ok, Dean. It's ok." Dean didn't say anything, and let himself being held and rocked while he cried. "Please don't cry, Dean. Please."

"I'm so fucking sorry, Cas." His voice was still raspy from sleep. "I'm so sorry I made you cry. It was supposed to be fun, and it was supposed to be perfect. I did't think, and I hurt you, and I'm sorry. I shouldn't have done that."

"No, you shouldn't have." Castiel hummed in his ear. "And yes, it was a cruel thing to do. But I'm sorry I didn't listen when you tried to explain." Castiel could feel Dean's fingers in his hair, on his face, cupping his jaw... as if to reassure himself Castiel was here, and it wasn't a dream.

"I was feeling so alone here. Sam has been bugging me to know what was happening, and I just couldn't tell him." He tried to wipe at his tears angrily. "I just hoped you would come back, eventually, to take back your stuff at least, and I could try to explain..." His fingers took a hold on Castiel's hipbones, pressing them together. "I saw how you threw everything away, and I just thought that's what you must've felt. You thought I was leaving." Castiel tiny nod is the only answer he needs. "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry." Castiel felt tears in his eyes, too. Because he was still so angry at Dean, but he was so relieved. It was just a stupid, cruel prank, but it was over now.

"Balthazar is going to kill you, you know." Dean tried not to laugh, but failed. It was a small but happy sound, and Castiel felt better already hearing it. 

"I know, he said so. But honestly, Sam is going to do it first. He's never going to forgive me." Castiel kissed Dean cheek to hide his smile. Sam was indeed a great friend. He was ready to talk more, and to reconnect with Dean, and them, but the small kiss was enough to move Dean away for any thoughts that weren't Castiel, and his lips and his skin. Soon enough, he was under a very amourous Dean, who seemed to be set on making his toes curl with just his lips and tongue. He could feel Dean's fingertips chasing goosebumps over his skin, and all he could do was to hold on to Dean's hair and try to breathe because everything was Dean, Dean, Dean. And for every moan, Dean would whisper back, Cas, Cas, Cas.

"You, know.. Ben said something about a ring." He couldn't really see Dean's eyes in the dark, but the fire made them glow like amber. Dean's lips were playing with his, and they stopped only for him to whisper.

"Merry Christmas, Cas."


End file.
